Tuesday, March 25, 2008

I can name that tune coffee in two notes words

Does it make paying $5.00 for a coffee seem worth it?

You know, to be able to use as many secret code words as possible to order it?

I may be one of only 17 people on the face of the planet that go into Starbucks and order in two words.

I take turns with a colleague of mine when we travel and need to make our Starbucks run. Her drink of choice is a venti iced decaf Americano, no water, ice to the top, two inches of nonfat milk, with 3 Splendas. Unless it's exceptionally cold that day, in which case it's a venti decaf Americano to the syrup line, two inches of nonfat milk and 3 Splendas.

We had the chance a few weeks ago to actually sit and enjoy ourselves together instead of being on the go and she freaked me out by ordering something different. I was so out of sorts as a result of her digression that I can't even remember what it was. No matter, she's getting her Americano any time it's my turn. It's committed to memory.

I've been chewed out by barristas everywhere for ordering it her way instead of as a venti with 4 shots which is the same thing, but my colleague has figured out that a venti with no water is, in fact, cheaper than a venti with 4 shots (trust me, this is part of her charm -- she's also been known to ask servers for their home phone numbers so she can call them at 3am if she got non-decaf by mistake, but that's fodder for a whole other post). I just smile and excuse myself for being such an enfant, then place my own simpleton order.

I'm such a rebel.


Tara R. said...

My confession... I have never ordered coffee at a Starbucks... too intimidating, too many choices. Baristas scare me.

Judith Shakespeare said...

LOL. That colleague of yours? She and I should be friends. Matter of fact, we all three should be friends and skip the coffee in order to move straight on to the tequila. :)

Hi! I'm Judith! It's very nice to meet you! Thanks for stopping by yesterday!

BusyDad said...

"Tall Drip" - I feel so cool being the coffee minimalist walking into the Starbucks line. But when I have to also order for my wife, who's waiting in the car, that's when I feel like the world's biggest idiot. Um... grande... non-fat, or is that skinny? or is it the same thing? sugar free ... white mocha... um (oh hey, you go ahead of me I have to make a phone call)...

A Mom Two Boys said...

I hate ordering at Starbucks. It's so stupid and I feel like such a schmuck. Why is it so popular? Stupid Starbucks.

Now I want one. MMMmmmm....Starbucks.

Ms. Maxwell said...

Tara - at least you know how to spell barista (which I clearly do not).

Judith - ::tickled:: that we've met! And I hope Starbucks doesn't kill you!

BD - Ah, so it's YOU that I want to ram in the drive thru as you are stumbling through d Wife's order...but your Tall Drip and my Venti Chai would make great friends.

AM2B - Damn that addiction. They breed it, don't they?

Anonymous said...

i'm such a starbucks princess. but mine's easy. i go for the grind - buy the whole bean by the pound and have them grind it up for me. it's after i get it home that it becomes a "you want it how?"

Senora Patron
bloghoppin' and sippin' on a Friday nite cuz my life is just THAT exciting. ☺

Unknown said...

Seriously, I could sit in Starbucks all day drinking regular coffee and water and giggle at the ridiculous orders. What a fantastic idea for a blog post. Just sit near the counter with my laptop and type away. It could even be a live blog post, hehe.

Unknown said...

I'm not a coffee drinker. I can't stand the stuff. So I really don't understand the whole Starbucks thing. But it looks funny when the movies show somebody ordering these many-named fancy coffees that cost a mint. I just don't get it.

Kathleen Stinnett said...

dearest Jennifer, this was hysterical. And to all of those who are commenting, I'm just glad that some of you can identify with the whole experience. From Jennifer's most-picky-of-colleagues-who-order-at-Starbucks, K

Ms. Maxwell said...

Senora P - You take connoisseur to a new level. But I knew that already by your choice of tequila. :-)

Huck - I'm SO waiting for that post. You will put the perfect filter on it!

Ashley - yep, no coffee for me. But tea? All over it.

K - Hee hee hee! Love you, Girlfriend!